Thursday, March 29, 2012

Most Frustrating Gaming Memories From My Childhood That I'll Probably Never Get Over

Let's kick things off with something fun!
Here's a nostalgic look back at those moments that killed me when I was younger and have always left a bad taste in my mouth. I will not be posting these memories in any particular order; rather I will simply provide a smattering of some annoying moments as I remember them. Let's get it started with the one that sticks out verryyy clearly in my mind.


Pilotwings (SNES)

The Final Mission

Falling through rings, then landing (that's Skydiving). Flying through rings, then landing (Light Plane). Using a jetpack to float through rings then landing (jetpack?). I'm starting to sense some sort of pattern here: something involving going through, or at least near, a series of colored dots–which upon said touching turns them to a different color, designating "passed". All this training from increasingly less-forgiving instructors to make sure you're ready for one final... WHAT THE?!? THIS HELICOPTER LEVEL IS SO IMPOSSIBLE!!!!

Is it just me, or did anyone else happen to notice that all of that so-called "training" you went through, in no way whatsoever helped prepare you for this final mission?  Not only do you fly a helicopter (something you had never been trained to use), but you also have about five thousand red dots on the ground trying to shoot you down with their anti-helicopter balls (AHBs), and about 70% of them seem to just shoot up out of the trees!!! And don't even try taking these things out, because if your crosshairs aren't just... perfectly... right over them, you miss and oops, there you go– you got hit and are now plummeting towards the ground (oh yea, did I happen to mention that you die from one hit??).

Ok, so now you're ignoring those things as much as you can and you're finally over the landing sight. Now all you have to do is slowly begin your descent... tilt a little bit to avoid all those AHBs completely surrounding the heli-pad... almost there... 100 ft... BOOM!!! Surprise attack!!! Guess what? You're dead. Time to start over for the fiftieth time. Honestly, I really want to know, how much time did you waste as a kid on this one single mission just so you could finally beat the game and feel a sense of accomplishment? 

Even when you do finally finish the mission. You get this nice achievement: "For recognition of your distinguished deeds, you are awarded Silver Pilot's Wings!" Silver.... SILVER!?!? I should get a freakin' Medal of Honor for the amount of lives I lost trying to complete that mission. If you want the Gold Pilot's Wings, you have to do that thing all over again, except this time it'll be at night. Excellent, even less visibility to see when those AHBs are flying right at you. No thanks. I'm just gonna go skydiving again, see how many flips I can do, and not "Push A to Open"my parachute. That'll take out my frustration, right?

But you know what I always will do when I see that Game Over Screen show up...


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